There have been a lot of changes at Syinly’s Weblog. As you may have noticed I enjoy reading books and I discuss them here on the blog. I have decided to now do a book blog in addition to discusses books occasionally on Syinly’s Weblog. Check out my post at http://bigblockgoesontop.wordpress.com/2009/06/20/gift-book-about-desmond-tutu/
Of course The Big Block Goes on Top inspired the title for the book and more information will be there as the release date nears.
Our new home http://syinlysweblog.net is not is still under construction but all new post and revisions of old post are there. If you have noticed disappearing post it’s because they have been revised and are now available only at Syinly’s Weblog.net Thank you for visiting.
In January I went to Neighborhood Assistance Corporation Association meeting. I had mixed feeling about going to homebuyer’s seminar. The neighborhood association in our subdivision threaten to ticket people for parking on the street and my parents refused to allow me to park in the driveway because my car was leaking oil. I took it to a mechanic and he told me it would cost to much to repair it, I would be better off buying another car.
In February, I got my federal income tax refund check. After La Freda’s basketball game. I went all over St. Charles County trying to find a check cashing place. Then I decided to drive in the city to the 24 hour check cashing place and they were able to cash the check. I walked out with five grand in my hand. I took the kids to get Steak and Shake and drove on to Carnection. The car salesman showed me a blue mini van. I told him I am not having any more kids. I need something smaller. The next car he showed me was a silver Chevy cavalier. Louie had told me silver was my color; when I rented him silver Hyduani Santa Fe. I kind of hated to trade in my white Nissan Maxium. I figured the car had taken me a long way since I drove it from Atlanta. I called Mrs. C and told her to dispatch the angels that were on the Nissian to this car. After we left the dealership in our cavalier we went to St. Louis Mills.The dealership insisted on auto draft payment so Sunday before my shift at Walmart I opened an account at the First Community Credit Union.
As part of my effort to get my own place I paid 430.00 to Ameren UE. I had outstanding past due balances on my utilities and realized in order to get service in my name again I would need to pay the balance. I had the NACA counseling staff people pull my credit and I realized that Neighborhood Enterprise had reported my judgment to the credit bureau.
In March Louie came for La Joy’s birthday. He was suppose to attend her party at Tumble drum and share in the cost of the party. His flight was delayed and he missed the party. We had to leave the party early to pick him up at the airport. We went to the Days Inn by the airport. La Freda and I left Louie and La Joy at the hotel we went shopping and then went to union station.
I had been celibate for almost four months when Louie came. I had broken my previous celibacy period with Louie. I spent the weekend telling Louie we would get married and his response was time will tell. Monday morning when we dropped Louie at the airport La Joy and I cried.
About a week later, I realized I was right back where I was before I jumped in the car and drove to Atlanta in 2003. I had to deal with feeling overwhelmed by the amount of debit was in. I started reading What To Do Until Love Finds You again.
I got a large child support check from Moses. I was able to pay the sales tax on the car I had the month before. Since I spent my refund on bills and transportation I went on a spending spree. I took the kids out to eat several times.
The second time Louie came to St. Louis in March. We met at his hotel. I realized I was still running like when I met him. I did not want to go home. I took the kids to the riverfront.
In April I was excited, because of my birthday and spring. For my birthday my parents took the girls and I out to dinner at O Charley’s. I was broke as usually.
I decided to start paying off the judgment against me with Neighborhood enterprise. On mother’s day I began to wonder if Louie had a serious relationship in Atlanta. When he had came in March he showed me pictures of his bedroom. I thought the only thing missing was me. I asked him if I came for a vacation could we stay at with him. He had said yes at first. Now that I was trying to finalize my plans, for where I would stay he was changing.
In June I took my first vacation from work in a long time. I had been quitting before I got a chance to take vacation previously. The girls and I went on a road trip to Atlanta. When we got to Tennessee we stopped to eat and I got lost trying to get back on the highway. I spent an hour getting mixed up. Then another hour stuck in rush hour traffic. We got to Mrs. C house it was late.
The next day we got up and went to Centennial Park. I got frozen lemonade. When we were homeless hanging out in the park, I would want one especially the first few weeks when I was not even receiving welfare or child support. I usually did not have money for one. I got La Freda some dippin dots. La Joy enjoyed playing in the water and she dragged La Freda and me into. We went to the under ground and ate Chinese food.
Later I met Louie and he took La Joy for the weekend. Saturday we spent the day with Mrs. C. We went over her sister‘s house and La Freda swam. I was looking at the scrapbook Mrs. C made about adopting her daughter. I told her I was going to start a scrapbook titled Journey to Home. Sunday we went to new birth for worship service. I thought I miss my church. Bishop was taking about out of Egypt. After ward I stopped by Bentley’s house to say he Hello he was not there. We went to Lennox mall. When it was time to pick La Joy up Louie kept changing the time. I was starting to worry that he would not give her back. I held her so tight when Louie handed her to me. Monday morning we headed back to St. Louis. Nobody wanted to leave Georgia but we knew Hotlanta was no fun being broke. I thought about an email I had sent before when I first got there. I put the subject as Hell in Hotlanta. Tuesday I went back to work. My dad was disappointed I had gone to Atlanta. When got back I finally went through the papers Mrs. C had kept for me since I left and found Bentley’s number.
Like Samson I didn’t heed my their advice about the men in my life. Relationships were my weakest I continued to compromise and move from one bad relationship to another.
The first few weeks back in Missouri, I wanted to leave. I thought somebody would try and stop. I thought Louie or Bentley would have asked me to stay. Soon I realized I to stay in Missouri because I had enrolled La Freda in school. During the first couple of months back while I was at home with La Joy, I started writing The Big Block Goes on Top, at first only my first homeless experience was included. A foster boy came to stay with us and that changed the dynamics of the house. It felt like we were still in the shelter so many rules.
As a result of my mother calling child abuse on me while I was Atlanta that reopened some unresolved issues in our relationship. I thought maybe if we attended a class at church together we could spend time together and begin to try and repair the damage. The class was interesting. I learned some things. At the end of the class we did spiritual gift assessment. I discovered my gifts were faith, encouragement, miracles, and teaching. I thought about how I liked to buy bible and other christian books for my friends, so I could see the gift of encouragement. Faith my experience in Atlanta had increased my faith. I didn’t understand the miracles, but I must admit God allowed a lot of miracles thing to happen to me while I was homeless in Atlanta. When we did a spiritual gifts assessment it was revealed that my mother’s gifts were mercy, administration and intercession. I thought that is bullshit.
While I finally went to apply for welfare in Missouri, no long waits like in Georgia. My caseworker told me she would send me to MERS goodwill to see if I need a GED. I thought she did not read my application stating I had graduated from college. At MERS goodwill I told them I had warrant for my arrest in Berkeley and they did not want me to do job search until I could clear up my legal issues because they thought the warrant would cause me to lose my employment. They referred me to the Connections To Success office in St. Charles to get clothes for an interview.
After Christmas I got job at a local call center. In my training class there were only three people. After the first day one person did not return. When I started training they wanted to sit me by these men and they were talking about some of everything. I thought I really did not want to sit by them because they might tempt me to talk about inappropriate things as well. During my probation period I was scared I would lose my job because La Freda kept getting sick the school would call me at work and I would have to leave and pick her up. A doctors visit was required each time before they would allow her to return to school. After my probationary period ended I won a contest a work and received a cash prize. I decided maybe I would stick with the job longer and decided not to look for something better. Later one of guys and I became close I had him draw me a picture of a red cross.
For my birthday I had a girl’s day out. I went to Apple bees in Clayton with my girlfriends and then we went to go see the movie Beauty Shop. It was the first birthday celebration, I had where I was not concerned about spending it with a guy. Moses and I were still trying to work things out. He kept saying I had not repented.
When my situation got similar to the how things were before I left St. Louis. I was living off a power strip. La Joy had stuck some scissors in the electric outlet tripping the circuit breaker. The social services had cut off my daycare assistance. I did not like my job anyway. I felt the company’s policy were unethical. They did not really allow us to help the people. I started getting bad performance reviews.
In previous employment history I had never gotten bad performance review except when I worked in a call center. I felt the like the dad in The Incredibles working or insura care. I got suspended for insubordination. The assistant manger told me to think about weather I really wanted this job or not and call them. They told me to call. I actual went back up there. I felt like if I did not drive there I would not go back. They refuse to allow me on the floor. I called from a phone in the lobby. I was supposed to inform management if I wanted to stay or quit. The project manager hung up the phone before, I could finish the sentence about I would quit. My job performance went up and then down.
For father’s day we went to Lake of Ozark and then on to Branson. The girls and I had our own hotel room that was the greatest. We rode on the ducks. I told my dad that was nice of him to take me a on a trip for father’s day. I attempted to quit again my unit manager talked me out of it. I thought God would not let me quit. After a year I finally decided to apply for sub sized housing. I was turned down because of a previous landlord reference.
Thanksgiving the girls and I spent with Moses and his mom had thanksgiving dinner at her house. I helped clean up after wards.
A week before Christmas I got a second job at wal-mart. I was surprised the wal-mart personnel manager that interviewed me said I looked like I belong in jewelry. The day before Christmas Eve I lost my keys in wal-mart. Moses came took me to work and dropped the girls at the day care. I told Moses my heart was hardened I was not going to try and reconcile things between us anymore. I had stopped calling him as much. I had known for weeks it was over. I just did not want to say it. When I decided to write my autobiography and he was so against it.
After I paid the locksmith, I went into Wal-Mart to get an extra key made. I got a key chain that said God never shuts one door without opening another one. I was thinking more about him opening the door to a house. A customer at wal-mart asked me if I would like to find some place to live. I told him yes but I had just started my second job and I did not have any saving yet. I talked to him a couple of times. He came back in after Christmas He told me he wanted a girlfriend. I told him I wanted to take it slow.
I decided I would post this since I have saved from 4 years ago. You can see I have been interested in trying to help people for while. I know it is part of purpose. The question how does God want me to service His people. I hope it will be through The People’s Resource Site.
Essay 2 –Ly Syin -LL987322447
Hands on Atlanta will allow me to transition into the education field. The people, technology, and communications skills I have will help me fulfill the programs mission of providing a caring adults that strive to give children a safe place to learn and an academic foundation to build on and teaching skills that can be used through out life and for scholastic purtist, as well as personal gain.
My customer service skills I have gained in business and especially educational settings will enable me to deal effectively with students, school staff and parents. I know from my previous work experience and volunteer that I enjoy teaching computer skills. At Harris state college I assisted computer illiterate students in becoming experts in power point and other software applications. It was rewarding for me to see students progress and embrace technology instead of fear it.
I have worked in the past with teachers doing distance learning.
As a smart classroom or multimedia technician I helped professors with integration of technology in the class room, assisting with power point presentations that appealed to auditory and visual learners. More recent lay I have taught t adults basic about Microsoft word.
During my time working at with pre-service teachers, I began to desire to become more involved in the field of education. Hands on Atlanta Americoprs project gives me the opportunity to get more involved in the field of education making the transition from observer to participant.
Being a service Leader will allow me the learn more about students learning style, lesson planning and class room management,
With my passion for reading and technology my goal is to become a library media technology specialist
At the transitional housing facility, they went up on my rent. Dr. Nash was not pleased with my cleaning abilities. I would clean up but I would not be able to maintain it. It like a mirror of confusion in my life. I could get things together temporary but I was never able to make progress and continue to improve. I would get frustrated that I could not figure out how maintain my living space in a clean and orderly fashion. I would clean up but it would not last long.
Ms. Sallie one of the women in the transition-housing program was mentally ill and she had stopped taking her medication. I was worried when the child abuse investigator came that she would act up. She told me she had already spoken with La Frieda at school. I was surprised. I told her about how I had been in three shelters since I got to Atlanta. I told her about La Frieda going back with my parents and that I picked her up from school.
I worked a couple of assignments for a temp agency. I did not have rent money for April. I had closed my welfare case in Fulton County and applied in DeKalb County. I thought the Child abuse investigator might look into that and cause more problems. As a result I would not be able to pay April’s rent. I went to talk with my caseworker and became hysterical. I apologized, but she insisted on sending me for a psychiatry evaluation. They prescribed me some pills and I never filled the prescription.
As a result of some stealing my identification at JOC , I had to retake the drivers state to get another driving license. I went to take the driving test. I was supposed to take the take test, in my Elizabeth from church car but something happen, so she had her son’s car. I did not want to drive a station wagon. At the DMV we discovered he did not have insurance. I had to call the man I was messing with and he let me drive his pick up truck. I was so nervous I failed the test. The driver’s license examiners said that was the worse ride she had all day. I laughed and walked off.
On day after I dropped La Freda off at school , I was on my way to the Mrs. C’s day care and I got a flat tire on the highway. I was able to get off the highway with out having an accident. I called Mrs. C, and Louie but they could not help. I drove down Convingtion highway with flat tire on the car. I stopped at a gas station. This man noticed the flat tire and asked me if I needed help. He offered to buy a used tire for my car. He followed me down the road to a used tire shop. He paid for the tire gave me the change which was five dollars. I told him thank you, he told me no thank God.
I starting looking for other transition housing, one of the places I applied required a drug test. They told me I show traces of popi. I was I was shocked I told the women I had been sober since 1990.
Bentley had come by the transition housing looking for me one the women there told me. I drove over his house. He was glad to see me. He told to call before I came next time of course. He gave me some money. I paid my car insurance. He told me to get the girls and me hair done. He took us out to eat and the movies to see Johnson family vacation.
In May we moved in with a man I had been flirting with in the apartment complex. I did not want to move so La Frieda could finish school. She attended 3rd third grade in three different schools. I had started talking to him months ago but when he told me he did not want anything serious just a good time I backed off. He also revealed he was married. Plus I had a relationship with Bentley. When his wife came over one day I felt so low. I was trying to leave before she got there. She was cordial to me. I realized he was drug addict. I let him use my car I had left my cell phone in it and he sold my cell phone for dope.
My mom had sent some money to take La Freda to the movies to see Scooby Doo. I had spent it on the rent. Now I had received some child support do I decide to go ahead and take her to see Scooby Do at Stone gate mall. Another time I let him use the car I had given my oldest daughter some money she left it the car and he spent that.
For June we stayed with a Family we met through church. We had been spending Sunday’s with them. One Sunday we had a picnic in the park. We went bowling.
We went to Hope house a shelter that was actually a house. The director was dominating man. He caused me to feel very uncomfortable. His treatment caused emotions I had not dealt with from my domestic violence to surface.
I volunteered for mega fest 2004 I signed up to do concessions. I went to the last volunteer training session. I had to get special permission from the shelter to attend. They could not find my name on the list of concessions volunteers from New Birth.
I saw the audiovisual volunteers and I signed up the last minute. My first day of Mega fest, I was thrilled to be with members of the potter house members in the audiovisual area. They had followed Bishop T D Jakes from Virginia to Dallas. The Audiovisual Director‘s wife was talking about writing a book. I was stumbling around behind the stage trying to get back to the audiovisual are the. I asked a lady who had VIPs pass on. I was so surprised when I realize she was the lady who read scripture for Juanita Bymaun.
Louie took my daughters and me the bus station. I could not believe it every time we went to St. Louis previously he would not meet us a station. He saw I had some money. He asked me to let him hold some. I leaned over and hugged him I told him we were not fucking anymore and I was not out of my mind.
We came to St. Louis for the fourth of July. We stayed at my parent’s house. We had a nice visit. I had promised La Freda we would visit for the fourth of July.
We went back so I could interview for Americorps. I had applied on line for service leader position, I wrote and essay about why I want to be involved. When we returned to Atlanta we had to fine a new place to stay because our spot at the shelter because I didn’t want to pay for them to hold the room.We stayed with Yoyo one of the parents that assisted Mrs. C at the daycare. Yoyo had three-bedroom apartment, she lived in with her two daughters and her baby daddy. Yoyo and her baby daddy cleaned her apartment for the when the DFS worker came out. Yoyo and her baby daddy pretended to be married and signed something stating we would live with them until I got stabilized. I was so shocked they would do all of that for me.
Not long after that Yoyo’s baby daddy starting being psychically abusive to her so I left. I told her I had been through that I already and I was not going to stay at her house and watch her go through that. I attended Americorps training for the first week. I was excited about getting into education. Hands on Atlanta released me from the corp. and refuse to pay my stipend and daycare expenses. I lost the section 8 apartment; I was trying to get because of not having a paycheck stub.
I tried to get cake daddy to get me an apartment. He was not moving on my time frame. I was sick and tired of shelters and living with others. The Georgia Division of Family Services threaten to take my kids from me, if I moved any more. I loaded up the car and drove back to St. Louis. I did not want to go to my parents’ house. I spent my first night at my grandmother’s house. My uncle insisted I go to my parent’s house. Within the first couple of days I went over Moses house he was staying his with mom. I thought if I went back to Moses maybe God would restore me.
At the transitional housing facility, they went up on my rent. Dr. Nash was not pleased with my cleaning abilities. I would clean up but I would not be able to maintain it. It like a mirror of confusion in my life. I could get things together temporary but I was never able to make progress and continue to improve. I would get frustrated that I could not figure out how maintain my living space in a clean and orderly fashion. I would clean up but it would not last long.
Ms. Sallie one of the women in the transition-housing program was mentally ill and she had stopped taking her medication. I was worried when the child abuse investigator came that she would act up. She told me she had already spoken with La Frieda at school. I was surprised. I told her about how I had been in three shelters since I got to Atlanta. I told her about La Frieda going back with my parents and that I picked her up from school.
I worked a couple of assignments for a temp agency. I did not have rent money for April. I had closed my welfare case in Fulton County and applied in DeKalb County. I thought the Child abuse investigator might look into that and cause more problems. As a result I would not be able to pay April’s rent. I went to talk with my caseworker and became hysterical. I apologized, but she insisted on sending me for a psychiatry evaluation. They prescribed me some pills and I never filled the prescription.
As a result of some stealing my identification at JOC , I had to retake the drivers state to get another driving licenese. I went to take the driving test. I was supposed to take the take test, in my Elizabeth from church car but something happen, so she had her son’s car. I did not want to drive a station wagon. At the DMV we discovered he did not have insurance. I had to call the man I was messing with and he let me drive his pick up truck. I was so nervous I failed the test. The driver’s license examiners said that was the worse ride she had all day. I laughed and walked off.
On day after I dropped La Freda off at school , I was on my way to the Mrs. C’s day care and I got a flat tire on the highway. I was able to get off the highway with out having an accident. I called Mrs. C, and Louie but they could not help. I drove down Convingtion highway with flat tire on the car. I stopped at a gas station. This man noticed the flat tire and asked me if I needed help. He offered to buy a used tire for my car. He followed me down the road to a used tire shop. He paid for the tire gave me the change which was five dollars. I told him thank you, he told me no thank God.
I starting looking for other transition housing, one of the places I applied required a drug test. They told me I show traces of popi. I was I was shocked I told the women I had been sober since 1990.
Bentley had come by the transition housing looking for me one the women there told me. I drove over his house. He was glad to see me. He told to call before I came next time of course. He gave me some money. I paid my car insurance. He told me to get the girls and me hair done. He took us out to eat and the movies to see Johnson family vacation.
In May we moved in with a man I had been flirting with in the apartment complex. I did not want to move so la Frieda could finish school. She attended 3rd third grade in three different schools. I had started talking to him months ago but when he told me he did not want anything serious just a good time I backed off. He also revealed he was married. Plus I had a relationship with Bentley. When his wife came over one day I felt so low. I was trying to leave before she got there. She was cordial to me. I realized he was drug addict. I let him use my car I had left my cell phone in it and he sold my cell phone for dope.
My mom had sent some money to take La Freda to the movies to see Scooby Doo. I had spent it on the rent. Now I had received some child support do I decide to go ahead and take her to see Scooby Do at Stone gate mall. Another time I let him use the car I had given my oldest daughter some money she left it the car and he spent that.
For June we stayed with a Family we met through church. We had been spending Sunday’s with them. One Sunday we had a picnic in the park. We went bowling.
We went to Hope house a shelter that was actually a house. The director was dominating man. He caused me to feel very uncomfortable. His treatment caused emotions I had not dealt with from my domestic violence to surface.
I volunteered for mega fest 2004 I signed up to do concessions. I went to the last volunteer training session. I had to get special permission from the shelter to attend. They could not find my name on the list of concessions volunteers from New Birth.
I saw the audiovisual volunteers and I signed up the last minute. My first day of Mega fest, I was thrilled to be with members of the potter house members in the audiovisual area. They had followed Bishop T D Jakes from Virginia to Dallas. The Audiovisual Director‘s wife was talking about writing a book. I was stumbling around behind the stage trying to get back to the audiovisual are the. I asked a lady who had VIPs pass on. I was so surprised when I realize she was the lady who read scripture for Juanita Bymaun.
Louie took my daughters and me the bus station. I could not believe it every time we went to St. Louis previously he would not meet us a station. He saw I had some money. He asked me to let him hold some. I leaned over and hugged him I told him we were not fucking anymore and I was not out of my mind.
We came to St. Louis for the fourth of July. We stayed at my parent’s house. We had a nice visit. I had promised La Freda we would visit for the fourth of July.
We went back so I could interview for Americorps. I had applied on line for service leader position, I wrote and essay about why I want to be involved. When we returned to Atlanta we had to fine a new place to stay because our spot at the shelter because I didn’t want to pay for them to hold the room.We stayed with Yoyo one of the parents that assisted Mrs. C at the daycare. Yoyo had three-bedroom apartment, she lived in with her two daughters and her baby daddy. Yoyo and her baby daddy cleaned her apartment for the when the DFS worker came out. Yoyo and her baby daddy pretended to be married and signed something stating we would live with them until I got stabilized. I was so shocked they would do all of that for me.
Not long after that Yoyo’s baby daddy starting being psychically abusive to her so I left. I told her I had been through that I already and I was not going to stay at her house and watch her go through that. I attended Americorps training for the first week. I was excited about getting into education. Hands on Atlanta released me from the corp. and refuse to pay my stipend and daycare expenses. I lost the section 8 apartment; I was trying to get because of not having a paycheck stub.
I tried to get cake daddy to get me an apartment. He was not moving on my time frame. I was sick and tired of shelters and living with others. The Georgia Division of Family Services threaten to take my kids from me, if I moved any more. I loaded up the car and drove back to St. Louis. I did not want to go to my parents’ house. I spent my first night at my grandmother’s house. My uncle insisted I go to my parent’s house. Within the first couple of days I went over Moses house he was staying his with mom. I thought if I went back to Moses maybe God would restore me.
At the transitional housing facility, they went up on my rent. Dr. Nash was not pleased with my cleaning abilities. I would clean up but I would not be able to maintain it. It like a mirror of confusion in my life. I could get things together temporary but I was never able to make progress and continue to improve. I would get frustrated that I could not figure out how maintain my living space in a clean and orderly fashion. I would clean up but it would not last long.
Ms. Sallie one of the women in the transition-housing program was mentally ill and she had stopped taking her medication. I was worried when the child abuse investigator came that she would act up. She told me she had already spoken with La Frieda at school. I was surprised. I told her about how I had been in three shelters since I got to Atlanta. I told her about La Frieda going back with my parents and that I picked her up from school.
I worked a couple of assignments for a temp agency. I did not have rent money for April. I had closed my welfare case in Fulton County and applied in DeKalb County. I thought the Child abuse investigator might look into that and cause more problems. As a result I would not be able to pay April’s rent. I went to talk with my caseworker and became hysterical. I apologized, but she insisted on sending me for a psychiatry evaluation. They prescribed me some pills and I never filled the prescription.
As a result of some stealing my identifaction at JOC , I had to retake the drivers state to get another driving licenese. I went to take the driving test. I was supposed to take the take test, in my Elizabeth from church car but something happen, so she had her son’s car. I did not want to drive a station wagon. At the DMV we discovered he did not have insurance. I had to call the man I was messing with and he let me drive his pick up truck. I was so nervous I failed the test. The driver’s license examiners said that was the worse ride she had all day. I laughed and walked off.
On day after I dropped La Freda off at school , I was on my way to the Mrs. C’s day care and I got a flat tire on the highway. I was able to get off the highway with out having an accident. I called Mrs. C, and Louie but they could not help. I drove down Convingtion highway with flat tire on the car. I stopped at a gas station. This man noticed the flat tire and asked me if I needed help. He offered to buy a used tire for my car. He followed me down the road to a used tire shop. He paid for the tire gave me the change which was five dollars. I told him thank you, he told me no thank God.
I starting looking for other transition housing, one of the places I applied required a drug test. They told me I show traces of popi. I was I was shocked I told the women I had been sober since 1990.
Bentley had come by the transition housing looking for me one the women there told me. I drove over his house. He was glad to see me. He told to call before I came next time of course. He gave me some money. I paid my car insurance. He told me to get the girls and me hair done. He took us out to eat and the movies to see Johnson family vacation.
In May we moved in with a man I had been flirting with in the apartment complex. I did not want to move so la Frieda could finish school. She attended 3rd third grade in three different schools. I had started talking to him months ago but when he told me he did not want anything serious just a good time I backed off. He also revealed he was married. Plus I had a relationship with Bentley. When his wife came over one day I felt so low. I was trying to leave before she got there. She was cordial to me. I realized he was drug addict. I let him use my car I had left my cell phone in it and he sold my cell phone for dope.
My mom had sent some money to take La Freda to the movies to see Scooby Doo. I had spent it on the rent. Now I had received some child support do I decide to go ahead and take her to see Scooby Do at Stone gate mall. Another time I let him use the car I had given my oldest daughter some money she left it the car and he spent that.
For June we stayed with a Family we met through church. We had been spending Sunday’s with them. One Sunday we had a picnic in the park. We went bowling.
We went to Hope house a shelter that was actually a house. The director was dominating man. He caused me to feel very uncomfortable. His treatment caused emotions I had not dealt with from my domestic violence to surface.
I volunteered for mega fest 2004 I signed up to do concessions. I went to the last volunteer training session. I had to get special permission from the shelter to attend. They could not find my name on the list of concessions volunteers from New Birth.
I saw the audiovisual volunteers and I signed up the last minute. My first day of Mega fest, I was thrilled to be with members of the potter house members in the audiovisual area. They had followed Bishop T D Jakes from Virginia to Dallas. The Audiovisual Director‘s wife was talking about writing a book. I was stumbling around behind the stage trying to get back to the audiovisual are the. I asked a lady who had VIPs pass on. I was so surprised when I realize she was the lady who read scripture for Juanita Bymaun.
Louie took my daughters and me the bus station. I could not believe it every time we went to St. Louis previously he would not meet us a station. He saw I had some money. He asked me to let him hold some. I leaned over and hugged him I told him we were not fucking anymore and I was not out of my mind.
We came to St. Louis for the fourth of July. We stayed at my parent’s house. We had a nice visit. I had promised La Freda we would visit for the fourth of July.
We went back so I could interview for Americorps. I had applied on line for service leader position, I wrote and essay about why I want to be involved. When we returned to Atlanta we had to fine a new place to stay because our spot at the shelter because I didn’t want to pay for them to hold the room.We stayed with Yoyo one of the parents that assisted Mrs. C at the daycare. Yoyo had three-bedroom apartment, she lived in with her two daughters and her baby daddy. Yoyo and her baby daddy cleaned her apartment for the when the DFS worker came out. Yoyo and her baby daddy pretended to be married and signed something stating we would live with them until I got stabilized. I was so shocked they would do all of that for me.
Not long after that Yoyo’s baby daddy starting being psychically abusive to her so I left. I told her I had been through that I already and I was not going to stay at her house and watch her go through that. I attended Americorps training for the first week. I was excited about getting into education. Hands on Atlanta released me from the corp. and refuse to pay my stipend and daycare expenses. I lost the section 8 apartment; I was trying to get because of not having a paycheck stub.
I tried to get cake daddy to get me an apartment. He was not moving on my time frame. I was sick and tired of shelters and living with others. The Georgia Division of Family Services threaten to take my kids from me, if I moved any more. I loaded up the car and drove back to St. Louis. I did not want to go to my parents’ house. I spent my first night at my grandmother’s house. My uncle insisted I go to my parent’s house. Within the first couple of days I went over Moses house he was staying his with mom. I thought if I went back to Moses maybe God would restore me.
This excerpt from The Big Block Goes on Top is from during my teenage years. Seek first the kingdom of God, I should have heard that verse much earlier in life.
Ceola my cousin was a bishop. She told me that when I learned not to focus on a man so much God was going to use me. Ceola told me she had run from God for a long time. She also told me one of my grandparents was doing to die. Paul, my grandfather died a few years later from prostate cancer.
We had been attending church for a few years, when I decided to be baptized. I was baptized at a Baptist Church, in the summer of 1988, so I could sing in the youth choir. I had wanted to join the youth choir because the kids in the choir seemed to be so happy. I thought God made them happy maybe it would rub off on me.
When I was baptized, I was wondering if I was pregnant. I wanted a fresh start, but I did not know how. I was the first person baptized that Sunday. A girl was younger than I was but she did not want to go first. The deaconess asked us what order we wanted to go in. There were 19 candidates for baptism. The girl suggested the oldest person go first. They decided to go by height. The girl was younger but I was the shortest. The pastor and the deacon held me up in the pool before they dunked me. I felt uncomfortable because they would not allow me stand in the pool but the congregation would not have been able to see me because of my height. That day my cousin Ophelia was baptized too.
Church was important to me there were many handsome young men there. I remembered few sermons. Jesus dying on the cross did not make sense to me at all. I enjoyed singing in the choir. My favorite sermons were about the fiery furnace from the book of Daniel and the untamable tongue. I could relate to that sermon because I was verbally abusive and very sarcastic.
My maternal grandma did not take communion and I struggled with communion too. I always felt I was not clean enough. I did not want to take it because of guilt. I never felt I was forgiven.
When I heard the choir perform Handel’s “Hallelujah Chorus” and everyone stood up. I thought if Jesus is here, I am not ready. Later I learned that everyone stood up because of tradition when it was first performed in London in 1743. The King was so moved with emotion he stood and everyone else did because he did.
I decided to attend Vacational Bible School I had gone one time before with some neighborhood kids and I enjoyed it. Since I was going to church on a regular basis, I wanted to go. On the first night when they asked why did we come? Did not want to admit I wanted to come. I said I came for something to do.
During VBS I got into with one of the teenage girls (her grandma was a deaconess) in my class she had a baby. She was attracted to this guy. They were talking about having sex with him on the church bus. Since she already had a baby, I gave the guy some condoms, because I thought she did not need any more babies. Some body told the director of Vacation Bible School. The director wanted to know where I got the condoms from, I told her my Dad gave them to me. The girl wanted to fight me and I was scared of her. The other people on the church bus had to hold her back as I got off the church bus. The next night I took a forty-ounce bottle with me. Nothing happen. After everything that happen, I was too embarrassed to continue going.
There are some bad girls in the bible. I can relate to Rahab, we don’t know why she was a prostitute but we can imagine that it her reason behind was to provide for herself and her family until she grew in faith and decided relie on God to provide. Like Joshua were actions were strong and courageous. It was very courageous for her to leave her old life style behind. I can also relate to the woman at the well. We don’t know why she so many husbands and the man she was with at the time Jesus confronted was not her husband. I like to thing she like me got involved with the wrong men and like me she practiced insanity and kept expecting different results. There is my personal story woman at the well story. The Big Block Goes on Top could very well be titled the Modern day woman at the well.
I noticed this attractive man that came in at first I thought he was the manager at Mc Donalds, because he was asking everyone how there food was . As he interviewed this man for position at this company. I asked him something and we started talking and in the course of the conversation. I told him I was homeless. He gave me his business card and he said he would donate some toys to shelter since was close to Christmas. I began talking to him and he became my cake daddy. One day before Thanksgiving it was raining Bentley called me and asked me where I was. I told him I was walking to the train station. He told me we shouldn’t be walking in the cold. He came and picked La Joy and me up and dropped us off at CNN Center. Bentley gave me some money and told me don’t be scared to spend it, that he would give me more later. I had never had a man give me money before. He offered to get my hair done. I was surprised. I told him no thanks I needed a coat. He agreed to buy me a coat. It was cold and I did not have coat. I spent the whole day wondering if he was my prince charming. I had read Ruth but I wasn’t looking for my Boaz yet. After he finished working he picked us up and took us to his house. I loved his house. He had decorated with African art. I thought I would probably decorate my house like his if I had one. It was so nice to be in somebody’s house. He told me I could take a nap in his bed. La Joy fell asleep she did not get a nap that day. He started feeling on me. We had sex. He took me to World Changes for worship service that Sunday. He told me was sorry he had taken advantage of me. The message was about sexual sin. I got mad at him and he gave me 100.00 dollars and dropped me off at the west end mall. I felt like trash my pride wanted to refuse the money but I knew I needed. I brought myself some clothes from Rainbow and some shoes. I brought a red coat at the thrift store. Newbirth would pick up the homeless at shelters in the Atlanta metro area. At Newbirth one Sunday a month they feed the homeless and gave away clothing. They also had beauticians and barbers do hairstyles. They gave away Newbirth bags. The one I received had “But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and all his righteous: All these things shall be added to you (Matthew 6:33). Louie took me over his cousin’s for Thanksgiving. We had traditional Thanksgiving dinner but everything was seasoned different. I got to meet one of Louie’s sister and an aunt. I joked with his aunt when we left that Louie should not be burden he should look good. She told me I would not let him have shit. I wondered when I took La Joy ride the Priscilla the pink pig at Macys I thought what would the family who had been so nice to La Joy. I got freelance audiovisual job at the Renaissance hotel in downtown Atlanta. I worked a week. My final day I was late. I lost track of time riding the train. It felt good to be working. I just wished I did not have to spend the day hanging out before I had to go. I was a tech for a party a local HMO was having. I had not worked with DVD’s much. I could not figure out how to fast-forward the DVD during the rehearsal. I prayed I spend the rest of the evening going over it. The view form the 25th floor was speculating. I thought I wish Louie could be there with me. Louie picked me up after work. I could not believe he was keeping LaJoy overnight and he would come to pick me up from work just to be nice. For Christmas the shelter had a lot of activities. The Atlanta hawks had a dinner party for us at a fancy Italian restaurant. They had cameras they were videotaping go hawks TV. They signed few autographs. This group gave us Wal-mart gift card. We go a lot of stuff. All I wanted was a place to stay. La Joy got all kinds of toys from the shelter it took about an hour to open everything. The Sunday before Christmas I went to the day shelter. I could not get a seat a on the bus. I went to the church next to my sister’s house. I saw one of the Minster’s that did a chapel service at my sister’s house. After church the Minster invited me along with his congregation for lunch at Furs Cafeterias. One of the church members gave La joy some home made candy. I spent Christmas day with La Joy and her dad. He was supposed to take us to movies we drove around to different theaters but nothing good for kids was playing. We ended up eating in CNN center. The day after Christmas we where cleaning up I was stressed out, my 90 days were almost up. I throw I broom and the staff put me out. Ms. C took my stuff to her house and said La Joy could stay until I found another shelter. I went back to JOC Louie came and picked me up he gave me the money to pay for a couple of nights. I bought a sleeping bag with what was left on my Wal-Mart gift card and I did not take much with me because my stuff was stolen last time. Before when I left the Salvation Army this girl gave me Operation Hope’s phone number. I had gone and filled out some paper work months ago. I decided to stop by. I got on the wrong bus and had to walk. They had an opening in their transition-housing program, but I would have a wait a couple of day because did not have not any money. I called the Hotel I had did freelance audiovisual work for and found out I had check that would be enough for me to move immediately. It had been so long since I had been in comfortable environment. This transitional housing program was in an apartment complex in Decatur. I lived with Dr. Nash’s administrate assistant, Ms. Sallie and Erin who was at my sisters house with me moved in a couple of days after me. Erin told me the night left at chapel service one of the evangelists had died. I thought thank God I was not there. I was so excited to get to attend the watch service at New Birth. I think being there was better than being in New York when the ball drops. I enjoyed Smokie Norful. Now I could cook my own food. Louie took La Joy and me to the grocery store. I told him about Cake daddy. Louie told me we would never have sex again. Dr. Nash asked me to give a testimony about my pain on the radio. I wrote the testimony and read it to him. He said I was not sharing my pain. Then I rewrote. I shared everything in my life that caused me to feel hurt from my parents getting divorced to my own divorces. I shared how I did not wash my face or brush my teeth because I was depressed. I talked about how I was the little lonely girl listening to the radio. He produced a play about homelessness. I did the lighting and sound. I taught a couple of computer classes for Dr. Nash.
There cometh a woman of Samaria to draw water: Jesus saith unto her, give me to drink. The woman saith unto him, Sir, give me this water, that I thirst not, neither come hither to draw. For thou hast had five husbands; and he whom thou now hast is not thy husband: in that saidst thou truly. The woman saith unto him, Sir, I perceive that thou art a prophet.
One day La Joy and I were at CNN center eating taco bell. This man sitting at another table started talking to us. He told me his name was Jesus. He asked who I was. I told him I am the woman at the well Jesus. He asked where that I was I told him I was in his word the Bible. I tried to find it for him in the bible but I did not know where it was. During service at New Birth bishop said to change your cell phone number because you need to separate from a man that you are involved with. I thought he was talking to me. I mixed feeling about my relationship with cake daddy. I gave my cell phone to Mrs. C and told her I thought that message was for me. Monday they could not change my cell phone number because of service problems. The next day, I went to the store and not service location. I checked the messages and Bentley had called me about the time I had handed Mrs. C the phone on Sunday. I did get the phone number changed. I gave Mrs. C, Bentley business card I did not know his number by heart. In February I got my income tax back Mrs. C started looking for a car for me. We brought a car I did not even have a driver’s license. I was on my way to Mrs. C house to give her 500.00 dollars I had borrowed when I bought the car. I thought I would try and catch Louie dropping off La Joy and give me this book by Myles Monroe. I wanted him to read it. I had missed the bus that dropped me off in front of Mrs. C’s house. Something told me to get on the bus where I would have to walk down. I saw Louie in the car with a girl. I walked on watching. I walked in Mrs. C house after Louie. I was so hurt. I had suspected Louie had another woman but now I had seen her. After he left, I asked Mrs. C if she saw Louie’s other woman. I sat on Mrs. C cough a long time I wanted to cry. My first day driving in Atlanta some one ran in to the back of me. I had gotten a permit. I did not know how to get any where in Atlanta driving. I was so use to taking the bus and train everywhere. I would drive to church even when I did not have any gas. God would put it on somebody’s heart to pass me and envelope with some money. I thought about how he provided daily manna for the Israelites. I kept pressing to I went to the singles conference at Newbirth. I had brought a book by one of the speakers a few weeks before. I enjoyed the conference. One day I went to lunch with my Elizabeth and some men form church.
In Bible Study I learned that there must be a need a before a miracle happens. During my homeless experience in Atlanta God blessed me tot the be the recipient of many miracles. I felt like the Isarelites in the wilderness, I had to depend on him for daily Manna. He never provided enough for me to store up but he always provided.
After La Freda, left Ms. Brown told me it was possible we would get a roommate. I was not pleased and angry with La Freda. I missed her so much. One day I took one of the other women at the shelter daughter to the park with me because she was close to the La Freda’s age. I thought that would help but the little was not well behaved and nothing like my daughter. We got a roommate and things started bad. My roommate Ally was from Argentina and bilingual. My roommate’s daughter caused La Joy to fall and had she had nice bruise. I decided to leave the shelter. I could not find another shelter. We went to Ellis Street I lost a whole package of pampers and the charger to my cell phone. I talked to Allie at the day shelter and decided maybe I had jumped the gun the next night we were not so lucky we. LaJoy and I rode the train late into the night. While we were on the train this man gave La Joy a key chain. He said I could use it to put my keys on after she tired of playing with it. He mentioned something about a home. I said we are praying on that. Before he got off the train, he handed me a ten-dollar bill. He said I do not know why but I think you can use this. We got off the train and went to K-mart. I brought some pampers and cheetos. We had cheetos for dinner. Finally, we went to the Task Force for the Homeless. I slept on the floor with no cover or mats with La Joy on top of me. Bugs were crawling on us. As soon as Marta started running, I left to ride the train until it was time to take La Joy to day care. I begged to go back to the Salvation Army and I had not received my refund yet. The first thing I did was bathe I had not had a bath in three days and I felt horrible.
Mrs. C bought tickets for me and one of the other parents to go HIPS, a gospel play about women and their relationship to men that were out of order. All the children in her day care were from single parent families. She really tried to encourage and help the parents.
My dad sent me a ticket to come home for my uncle’s funeral. It was round trip ticket. I accidentally washed the ticket and it was destroyed. I stayed in St. Louis for a month. La Joy and watch TV all day. I would help La Freda with her homework after school. I think I needed a break from shelter life. Living in the shelter had been hard on my psychically . I had lost some weight. That was a good thing though.
I left St. Louis to go back to Atlanta Halloween night. La Freda was so upset about not going trick or treating. She made me feel so guilty. I wanted to take her back with me. I felt a little spooky riding greyhound bus on Halloween. I slept most of the trip. I had been thinking about going to JOC. I had heard good things about them. I soon realized the Salvation Army was better. I was paying more money to sleep on the floor in a church, then I had been paying to have a semi-private room. There was no privacy. There was only one shower for everyone.Don was at JOC he had found a job at the Omni hotel downtown. The food at JOC was worst then Salvation Army and there was no dining area. La Joy and I usually eat at the underground and then caught the bus from five points back to the shelter. I was so tired one night and one of the other guests, woke me up because I was snoring. Four of my suitcases were stolen out of the storage shed and I lost my identification and all my important papers. I was devastated.
This women name Gwen came to stay at JOC. I had seen her before at the Atlanta Library on each Peachtree. I had suspected she was homeless. She told me My Sisters house was accepting women. It was a brand new shelter. It was a relief after JOC and it was free. I asked a West Indian guy to give me ride to My Sister’s house, I could not take all my stuff on the bus. He kept trying to talk me into staying with him in a motel in Cobb County. At My Sisters house they wanted us to go to chapel service every night. I was in a room with a lot of young women who had to grow up fast. At My sisters house they made the single mom’s go to a Christian parenting classes. I was there a while before I got a suite mate. La Joy would be praise God in chapel. Everyone would comment on how La Joy praised the Lord. I thought about how before when I went to the prayer breakfast my coworker invited me to in St. Louis the speaker told me I need to praise God stop being focusing on men. I started going to New Birth while in my sister’s house. I did not even know how to get there for sure. When I got to five points, I saw some other homeless people that were going to New Birth so I followed them. La Joy did not have any pampers. At church, I asked a woman in the bathroom whose child was the same size. I felt embarrassed, but did not have any pampers or any money. At New Birth Rodger’s Minster in training man gave me some money. I went to Mc Donald’s and to buy some pampers from Kmart after church.
After graduating from college, I did not want to come home to St. Louis. I sent out my resume to media outlets. I got a call one night about an opening at local low power television station in Ponca City. One the girls I went to school with had worked there before. I went on the interview my car broke down and the way home. I got the job at the small television station in Ponca City Oklahoma. One of my Alcoholics Anonymous home group’s members loaned me his car for a week. I commuted 80 miles a day to and from work. The people who had supported me during college went out of there way to help me. My friend from the domestic violence shelter and her husband came to pick me and take back to Winfield in a rainstorm. The baby sitter took me to work. I got the dealer ship to resend the sale on the first car and put me into another.
I had never wanted to be an anchorperson. I when attempted to anchor SCTV our college news program I got so nervous. They said I sounded like I was rapping. The news producer/camera man told me they would provide me with training. My training consisted of live promo before my first newscast. At KPOC, I was the news director, anchorwoman reporter, and video editor. One night I was more nervous then usual. I mispronounced everything and said the call letters backwards I was suspend from on air.
I was at the jail to interview the sheriff and a reporter from the local newspaper was there. I had plagiarized his copy the night before on air. I was sure he was going to confront me. He complemented me on the story.
I went to the federal building in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma one year after the bombing. I was wearing my press badge. The people were emotional and mean to the press. I took my friends middle school daughter with me. Her daughter looked up to me and I thought I could make a positive influence possibly. My favorite story that I covered was “The drug store “a scare kids away from drugs project. They take the kids on the journey drugs take you on from the party, to the hospital, to court and finally to the casket. When you look inside the casket there was a mirror. I wonder would have not been an alcoholic if I had that in high school.
The commute was hard on me. I was not spending any time with La Freda. My mom suggested I rent a room, until I could find an apartment I liked in Ponca City. She came to Ponca City to help me find some place. She took La Freda to St. Louis until I was settled. The landlord was a nice lady she had multiple scirors. One day I was having a horrible day. I ran over something knocked the water out for the boarding house. I was saying the short version of the serenity pray “fuck it”. I did not want to turn my life and my will over to the care of God. I wanted God to get me on the right course and then I wanted to take control.
I went to Narcotics and Alcohol Anonymous meetings in Ponca City because they were smaller than the Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. I had gotten use to small meetings in Winfield. More men from the halfway house started coming. In the meeting, someone blabbed I was a news-person. I told them I knew what anonymity was I hoped they did too.
I was talking to a white guy I met at the meetings Greg. At first, I thought Greg did not like me. One night the group was going out after the meeting but I had to go back and do the news. He invited me for coffee after the broadcast. One day we where at a pizzeria I wonder why people where looking at me was it because I was with a white guy or because I was on the news. The relationship did not go anywhere. I could not imagine being intimate with a white guy.
I was scared about being away from my support system. I asked a 17-year-old girl I met at the Narcotics Anonymous to baby sit. That was a mistake. She wrecked my car. I let her drive my car and I used the company car. In April I quit because I was feeling overwhelmed. I was working from about 9 am till 10:30pm at night. The other person that made up the news team had quit. I learned a lot but I did not feel comfortable.
My family spent graduation weekend helping me load the U-Haul truck. I had always prophecy that on graduation day the moving truck would be packed. My friend had mailed my cap and gown to me. It had gotten lost in the mail. I could not participate in commencement with out it. I went the bookstore and rented another cap and gown. Then I called my friend to make sure she would attend graduation. She gave me Tupac’s Mackeville cd as a graduation gift. She told me she had the cap and gown. I went to her house to pick it up. I did not like the length of the original gown I order. I went back to the bookstore and exchanged it.
I went to Traveler’s Aid they gave me a bus pass and agreed to pay my first month’s rent 140.00. I had only asked them to pay the first week’s rent. While La Joy and I were there this hungry homeless white man gave La Joy, some crackers and his ensure. We could not really keep milk. I was glad she off formula. La Freda got ringworm. I felt so guilty we had never had anything like that before. I took her to the clinic. I sold my bus pass at the men’s shelter a few blocks away to get some medicine for ringworm. I did not want to ask the shelter for help getting the medicine because they would post a notice saying somebody had ringworm and I did not to deal with that.
Centennial Park became our second home. I would sit and watch the people. Dreaming about coming here with the girls after we were settled. We would watch the water show. Don a single father with two boys helped us before I was approved for welfare. He would buy us stuff to eat. He taught me how to get around downtown Atlanta. He allowed me to use his bus pass since I had sold mine. We went to the free concerts in the park. We saw La Tosha Scott of Escape.
After a couple of weeks my parents came, they found me at the library I had just sat down to email my friends from St. Louis. We left and went to La Frieda’s school. They took us out to dinner at Chili’s in Alpharetta and showed me where my uncle lived. I was so shocked I could not finish my food. I was never full when I finished eating meals at the shelter they were not filling. I was always hungry. My oldest daughter decided to go back to St. Louis with them. That was the hardest weekend. I thought about giving my youngest daughter to her Dad. That Monday I was so glad I changed my mind, when La Joy held me so tight. I thought I was stupid to let one child go but not the other.
The amount of day care assistance the state of Georgia gave me was not enough to put La Joy in a day care center. One center said they would work with me but they would not put it in writing. My day care caseworker refused to approve my day care assistance. She told me people here in Atlanta people will run game on you. She gave me a dollar to call her back once I found a day care center. I used it to get La Joy a snack for the day. I did find a way to call her. I finally got day care for La Joy after being in Atlanta 3 weeks. I thought about what my Grandma had said when I was in Ponca City and had a day care issue. She asked did I pray about it so I prayed. At the Atalnta day shetler, I used the phone to call a list of at home day care providers in the booklet I was given at the social services office. I met Mrs. C. Mrs. C answered the phone the others I got answering machines. Day care was important for La Joy it meant she would eat and be safe all day long.
La Joy would beg strangers for candy and snacks. I was so embarrassed but I did not stop her because she was probably hungry. The morning bus driver would flirt with me and gave La Joy candy. I could relax at Mrs. C house. She let me store food there. I started job hunting. I applied at fast food places and hotels. I got an interview at Marriott Marquee for a banquet position. I got a call back for a second interview but they had filled the position before I could call them to schedule a time. Mrs. C’s husband tired to get me a job at the hotel he worked at. I got an interview there and I went to the Day Shelter to get some clothes. They gave me a navy blue pants suit. I had never interviewed before in pants suit. I did not have any make up. After a couple of months I got tired of looking for a job, so I hung out at the library reading magazines, books, emailing friends and applying for jobs online. Some days I would feel sad because I missed working in the library.
I hated the days the day care was closed. We would have to ride the train all day. I felt I did not want to expose La Joy to the day shelter more than I had. If I did not have any money or Food stamps, we would go.
Things got a little better after received my final check for my library job in St. Louis. I was the shelter baller then. Having money was frustrating because I still did not have what I wanted place to stay. I brought a cell phone. Louie came and got us. We drove around to all the studios in Atlanta. After that we went to the hotel. When he was in St. Louis, we had found the address for the studio on the Internet. La Joy would not go to sleep. Louie and I were getting intimate. I had been celibate for a year. Someone knocked on the door and broke the hold mood.
Don and I looked at an apartment we thought about moving in together. I wasted my money on the application fee. Don decided he did not like the property owner after we left the office. Don wanted to date me but I was stuck on My Chocolate boo, Louie. Don was put out of the shelter for not being able to pay his rent, I was so sad. I wished I could have helped. The previous week a woman from Florida paid Don’s rent.
At the Salvation Army, different churches came to pick up the homeless I decided to go one Sunday. I went to Word of Deliverance church. When I got to the church I could have fell out they had banner that said out the Egypt the same thing I thought when I was in the car on the way to Atlanta. One weekend I decided to follow Mrs. C to her church Newbirth. I thought it looked like an arena it was so huge. I was amazed to see all my black people praising and worshiping God together. It was an awesome experience. I continued to go to Word of Deliverance until I left the Salvation Army shelter. The church members encouraged the visitors to participate in the service not just sit on the pew. They encouraged you to sing along and dance. Before then I spent services asking God about should I marry the man in my life.
