Even with my Issues

One of my favorite books by Dr. Wanda Turner is,  “Even with my Issues.” In the book she challenges individuals to start ministry where they are. She encourages her readers to feel they can still contribute in the midst of going thru.  ” 107 Ways to Give When You Have Nothing to Give” was written by Jana Gamble.  Ms. Gamble is a survivor and a overcomer.  She wrote the book after leaving an abusive relationship. I met Gamble at Dress for Success Midwest Professional Women’s Group. After reading her book I felt inspired to start volunteering. Which led to me discovering my passion to help people. I assisted several  people with growing their organization before starting Ladies of Inspiration Success. I was not really ready to launch LOIS but I felt compelled to  organize a domestic Violence awareness event in 2012.

After going through mental health issues, LOIS was put on the back burner. A friend I had met at women’s group  encouraged me to  focus on LOIS again. She shared with me that despite what ever I am going through. I need to push through.  God would bless me for doing what he has called me to do. It feels empowering to give back to others despite having been through domestic violence. I hope in sharing my story I encourage other women to move forward in what they are passionate about.

Our goal is make to make 50  personal hygiene baskets for women. Women are struggling with weight of the world. We just want to encourage them. I  have  benefited from resources in the community and now it is time for me  to encourage other women, by giving away baskets.



Steve Harvey’s Relationship book based on biblical princples

Disney’s story of The Princess and Frog, is a classic example of Christian Love. In the story of The Princess of the Frog, Tiana discovers what we discover as Christians that Love is the truth,  and the truth will set you free.Princess Tiana is busy living her life when love finds her. She was working as waitress and saving money when Prince Naveen came to town.When She realized that she loved Prince Naveen and being  with him was worth sacrificing her dream. Through,  Tiana and  Prince Naveen we see an example of love. Do you want to know more about love? Read the bible.

The bible deals with several types of love, apage, eros, and  philly. To understand more about love explore the bible verse dealing with the topic. The bible clearly defines the different types of love.  Reading a bible written in plain english makes the concept of love easy to understand.

The bible is good relationship guide. Steve Harvey’s new relationship. Harvey’s ideas are based on biblical principles. Harvey does believe the biblical principle that a man should have accomplish something before he began to look for a mate. The bible shows us that it important for a man to be busy fulfilling his purpose.  In the book of Ruth , it tells how Boaz noticed Ruth in the field. He was busy with agricultural management when he noticed her.

Harvey believes a man does not have to achieve total career success but he must at least know his purpose before he can focus on a relationship. This idea is supported in the book of Samuel when David refused to marry King Saul daughter because he had nothing to offer. Once Saul stand he would accept 100 Philistine foreskins, David accomplished that feat and was awarded a bride. David’s career path was clear to him at this point. The prophet Samuel had already anointed him to become the next King. David was showing himself as skilled military man, he had already defeated Goliath.

#True Tori (Living Paycheck to Paycheck)

Sometimes I read and/ or  hear something  that  just really agitate me. Celebrity Tori Spelling says she is “Living paycheck to paycheck”.  I understand being famous does make you immune to financial difficulties. We have heard recently about famous people losing houses and cars. Some formerly famous people have had to seek employment outside of the entertainment industry. It is hard for me to comprehend Tori Spelling who is on tv living paycheck to paycheck. Her father was a multimillionaire. She has been television star since she was teenager. Now my life has featured more than it’s fair share of drama.

At first I thought how dare Tori say she is living paycheck to paycheck. She knows nothing about that lifestyle, but maybe she does. She definitely knows about having poor self-esteem. True Tori her docudrama has proven that. Wise people always say celebrates are just like us they put there pants on one leg at time.

I would like Tori to use the status to encourage other women living paycheck to paycheck. The ones that are not famous. If you are really having budgeting problems have Dave Ramsey on your show. He could help you and others living paycheck to paycheck. Then get Iyanla Vanzant ( Iyanla fix my life) she can help take care of the emotional issues. Not to mention Iyanla has lived paycheck to paycheck before. She knows a thing or two about that.

God’s Permissible Will

Recently I shared my opinion on whether  Christians should have tattoos. I know lay Christians with tattoos as well as minister and even bishops. Some had tattoos before they embraced the faith and some have gotten tattoos afterwards. Leviticus 19:28 has this to say on the issue” Do not cut your bodies for the dead or put tattoo marks on yourselves. I am the LORD. ”  My interpretation of that is God is not in support of tattoos.  His permissible will allows tattoos just like it allows divorce. I have never gotten a tattoo but I have been divorced twice. I thank God for his mercy. As I was thinking about the should Christians get tattoos. I thought to me what matters more than christian appearance is christian action. I believe Christian behavior will have more of an impact than appearance ever could.

I admit it is easy to judge people with tattoos but scripture warns use Mathew 7:3 ,”Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?” Tattoos are visible but there are so many other sins we commit against our own flesh like gluttony, fornication, adultery, drinking and drugging.

No sin goes without consequences even with God’s permissible will. God will enable us to handle the consequences and be there for us as we endure. Divorce is painful, because soul ties are broken. It affects every area of the your life. With tattoos their is pain upon application.  There are risk of allergic relations,  youthful  remorse, not to mention other health risk.

Both divorce and tattoos have roots in idolatry. “Idolatry is a matter of the heart—pride, self-centeredness, greed, gluttony, a love for possessions and ultimately rebellion against God.” Read more:http://www.gotquestions.org/idolatry-definition.html#ixzz3GovZJ7LH

Self centeredness and pride destroy more marriages. Getting a tattoos is rebelling against God, but all other acts that dishonor his will are doing the same thing.

As much I want to believe my body belongs to me I have to admit it on loan from God. It’s not really mine. If I loaned a friend my car I would expect them to take of it. Not to just treat it any kinda of way. If I borrowed my friend’s car I would  drive with  caution because I would like to return it in good condition. I would mark it up with a permanent marker.

God’s word is cutting me today, because I have not treated His property well.

Never Been Hungry

In my favorite book, the bible there is a narrative about a widow who fears going hungry during a famine in the land. The prophet instructs her to make prepare food for him and then prepare something for herself in son ( The Widow and Elijah at Zarephath). They were blessed and able to eat during the famine. It seems famine( hunger) is not new. There is nothing new under the sun.

I have been homeless 3 times in my life. Despite that fact I not really dealt with hunger.  The first week I realized the importance of being back at the shelter in time for dinner.   My family and had to have candy and chips for dinner. During the first few months of my last homeless experience I often felt hungry. I was able to get 2 meals so days but I never felt full. I was blessed.   One night when I was homeless I shared a bag of cheetos with my toddler. As we settle into homeless life as much

I have faced food insecurity, at time what has been available has not been what has been desired, but that is different from being hungry. Having food pantries available  in the communities I have lived in is a blessing.  I am also thankful for soup kitchens. I have been blessed by neighbors and friends sharing meals.

In 2010 and 2012 I had the opportunity to feed others. It was blessing to give back and feed homeless women and children.

In Genesis, we see the importance of working together during times of hunger. Joseph came up with a plan to feed Egypt and neighbor countries. Please share a meal whether it is by donating food, time or money to the lunch food pantry or soup kitchen.

  • More than 745,000 children (PDF) in Illinois are at risk of hunger and not getting the food they need to lead healthy, active lives.
  • More than 23 percent of households (PDF) in Illinois with children struggled to afford enough food for themselves and their families in 2010.

NO Kid Hungry in Illinois


Don’t trip (politically incorrect) God Ain’t through wit me yet!

I debated about this post, then I thought about what to title it. My first ideas was Being REAL. Then I thought about Steve Harvey’s title when he was asked to provide comedic entertainment at Megafest, “ Don’t Trip God Ain’t through wit me yet.” I thought that feels right  cause if I say something that offends someone in this post. It’s not out of malice.  Just pray for me.  I wanted to talk about those things I think that we usually suggest don’t have those conversation in public. Then I thought what if my sharing my ignorance honestly  lead to some growth. It’s worth the risk. Since officer Darren  Wilson killed Mike Brown I  have talked more about racism and prejudice. Today I decided to explore  some  of my prejudice ideas.

 A few weeks ago I got into a discussion on twitter as a result of retweet about racism. I had not really focused on that prejudice and racism are not just wrong but sins. I had felt justified being prejudice but now I realize, that rationalization not the truth. God is not pleased with prejudice attitudes. He doesn’t need me to judge His creation.

Side bar my children are very opened. I don’t know how but I am thankful.  My youngest daughter and I were riding the metrolink. A gay couple got on sat behind us. I wouldn’t have know their orientation had not the one guy said to the other,  “put your bags here, so we can cuddle.”  My daughter looked at me knowing I was uncomfortable. I thought to myself if were heterosexual would I still feel uncomfortable? I don’t really believe in public displays of affection between adults. Children that another story. Then I thought what if they start making out ? They didn’t so, I didn’t have to worry.  Yes, if a heterosexual couple made out in the presence of me and my daughter I would feel uncomfortable too.

 After the initial reactions, I thought these gay guys are brave. From all the hate crimes you hear about I would have thought they would have fear homophobic people attacking them. Today I heard a gay man telling about a horrible retail experience. He said a cashier looked at pictures of his family and seemed disgusted. I thought glad I was not that cashier. I know I would have acted awkward.  To handle the situation. I thought I would have to put my judgmental/ christian attitude on the shelf.  Funny  being judgmental and christian are opposites for real.  As christian I am to show love and compassion to all.

 My other reaction was I am black female, this man has not experience prejudiced like me. I had to realize I can’t judge somebody else’s emotional pain.

 I have to deal with my beliefs. I can not cling to the idea “God Hates Gays”. God hates sin period. He hates , lying , fornication, adultery and every other sin I have committed. In order to convert more people to Christianity it is going to take kindness. Hate speech, guilt and shame are not going work. Even if you do convince somebody to believe in God. You will hinder their  relationship because they will view God as the author of guilt and shame. When God is truly the author of Love and kindness.

 I believe once you develop a relationship with God, the spirit will convict you on wrong actions.

About a month ago, the pastor was sharing about woman that had come to church in attire that showed off the girls (her bare breast). He said she also had visible passion marks. he scolded her for coming to church like that.  I got upset, I thought he shouldn’t have shamed this woman.  I thought that why people don’t want to come to church. Jesus didn’t shame the woman caught in adultery. He didn’t shame the prostitute who anointed him. He didn’t even shame the woman at the well. Even Rahab the harlot was not shamed but given the chance to learn the faith and become respectable.

What about come as you are?  I really do believe when people know better they will do better. God will come convict them.  I am not  pastor or other church but I will suggest to what was suggested to me in AA keep coming back. Bring you butt your mind will follow. Yeah, I am going to talk about your plunging v, short dress or skirt, That you seem like liquor , have body odor. Even though I had to go to church all jacked up before with body odor myself. You keep coming. You might have to share what you learned in the sermon with me one day.  The irony will be I missed it because I was trippin on you instead of focusing on the sermon.





Responce to When Racism is Reversed

Thank you for being willing to open the dialogue on race in this country. I agree with some of your points. We truly are all one race and that’s the human race. Now our ethnic backgrounds vary and we need to respect each other. Maybe schools should offer culturally diversity.  For me taking multicultural literature allowed me to see, we have more similarities than differences.Love

Our America needs to have the hard dialogue about prejudice and racism. I do believe only white (Caucasian Americans) can be classified as racist. Racism is tied to economics. I do believe all people can prejudice.  Blacks or African- Americans do not have the economic power to enforce racism.

I am not saying that prejudice has not induced hate crimes committed by black against whites. I am aware of the Reginald Deny case and I am sure there are many more. Hate crimes should never be accepted  the perpetrator(s) should be punished regardless of race. As humans it is our moral responsibility to respect each other and not harm one another.

I know forgiveness is important, but before we can get to forgiveness we must do the hard work. Which means have an open  honest conversation and acknowledging our history with it’s ugly truths.  In my family we are only 4 generations away from slavery. My grandmother grew up on the McCain plantation  (yes plantation is owned by Senator John McCain relatives). With each generation we see more opened minded thinking and less prejudice. Prejudice is passed down generation by generation.

We have to remember that people of  African descent have been oppressed in this country for hundreds of years first by slavery and then Jim Crow, now through various economic and educational  disenfranchisement. When we demand equality in opportunity, racism will slip away.  It will require more for prejudice.

Now as far a Black police officer killing a white youth. I do not believe it would go trial but I do believe. The black officers actions would result in his death. I believe we would find out the black officer committed suicide in jail (suspicious death). I have heard some cases where black on black crime have received lesser sentences than blacks committing crimes against Caucasians.

In conclusion, it’s past time we deal with racism and prejudice and move on deal with issues that affect a our global community like homelessness, domestic violence and hunger.

Esther Round Up

The world’s greatest beauty pageant is what Esther’s  story seems like on the surface. As we  read from the book of Esther we realize  there are many nuggets of wisdom. We can use these principles as practical application  to our own personal situations. In the previous post in this series we, learned about the power of attraction and strategies for civil disobedience. As far blogs are concerned a round generally is a  reference to various post with no connection.   Esther’s narrative has many instructions for living.

God Can

In the testimony of Esther we see that God use anybody. In the ten chapters that make up the book of Esther.  We see God use a Jewish elder to save a heathen King.  Mordecai advised  his niece Esther of the assassination plot. We see a eunuch help a beautiful woman enhance her appearance and win the king Xerxes favor.  We see God elevate a foreign orphan to the office of queen.

“God serves his own purposes even by the sins and follies of men, which he would not permit if he know not how to bring good out of them.  ” Matthew Henry Commentary

Esther has several examples that provide evidence of this principle.    We see this principle in action through the king’s behavior.    The  king is guilty of folly when he divorces Vashti, which opens the door for Esther to become queen.   God uses Haman to illustrate prejudice and anger  can influence you to make stupid decisions. Haman holding on to prejudice views that  were passed down.  His folly was his ungrateful attitude he was a part of the royal  court, but that was not  good enough for him.

Family Influence

Family influence can be a blessing or a curse.  In Haman’s experience we see how family influence can have a negative impact.  Haman’s ancestor pasted down  their feelings of  hater for  Jews  from generation to generation. When Haman’s evil plot was uncovered he lost his life and even his sons were  killed. Moredaci raised Esther, to have  good character. She was beautiful inside and out. He taught  her about  trusting God and honoring her elders.

Importance of Wise counsel

Through out the book of Esther we see the importance of counsel. The king had a group of advisers. Esther received wise counsel  from her uncle Mordeci. He advised her to protect her identity. Then he advised her  to  consult the king regarding her people. The eunuch, Hegai  provided Esther with wise counsel about what to take with her when went before the king.

 Importance of Appearance

At the beginning  of the book of Esther we learn Vashti was beautiful.  King  Xerxes appreciated beauty. The women in the harem spent twelve months receiving beauty treatments.   When she went before the King  to ask him and Haman to dinner.  Esther  presented herself as the Queen. She put on her royal robes.


Sitting the Mood (The Ask)

The book of Esther deals with how to ask questions. Haman asked the King for his permission for ethnic cleansing. He set the tone for the king to agree to his petition. He explained that the people did not respect the King. He offered money to sweeten the deal.  When Mordecai asked Esther to go before the king.   He  was prepared when  presented evidence of  Haman’s evil plot.  He stressed the importance of the situation. After hearing what Mordecai had to Esther fasted and prayed. She petitioned  God for guidance.   Esther was prepared for what ever happen when she approached the King without his invitation.  She knew the her husband. Esther dressed to impress.  She was aware that he husband delighted in beauty and food. That is why she asked him to dinner.   Esther ensured  the king was comfortable before she made her request known.

 Importance of Celebrating (Rejoice)

At the beginning of the Book of Esther, King Xerxes is having a feast to honor military leaders and nobles. At the end after the Jews are able to defend themselves there is another celebration. The fact that there are two feast within 10 chapters shows, the significance of celebrating.  You should rejoice at the start and conclusion.



Esther the Queen of Civil Disobedience

This is my second post on my series on biblical character Esther. Her story is proof that the bible is full of practical instructions before leaving Earth.


I have read the book of Esther several times. One reason I favor Esther is because the story is about a woman. It seems at times that Christianity is patriarchal.  Esther’s story affirms that God loves women too. I started an online bible study on the book of Esther in the midst of the community in Ferguson, Missouri to  Mike brown’s shooting. Civil disobedience was practiced in biblical days in response to injustice.  The strategies of  protest are: first mourn, Do not be quiet and just accept the situation. The community should gather together and demand change.


Great Mourning is an appropriate response to injustice

 In chapter we learning that great mourning was the response to the edict King Xerxes? signed saying the Jews could be killed without repercussions.  In America police can brutalize and murder citizens without consequences.  Just like there was history between the Agagite and Jews. There has been a history of mistrust and racism with the police department.   The community especially blacks in Ferguson feels their government does not care about their welfare. Citizens of Ferguson and beyond showed their grief through protest. In Ferguson some chose to vented their grief  as anger resulting in the destruction of property.  When King  Xerxes signed the edict Jews once again where displaced. They had tried to blend with the dominate current, but now they were rejected.


Don’t be quiet and just accept

Esther’s uncle  Mordecai taught us Don’t be quiet and just accept. When he overheard citizens plotting to kill the king. He relayed the information to Esther so she could inform the king. When Mordecai discover Haman’s evil plan, he went to Esther and  asked her to talk the king. Esther could have just been quiet , and allowed her people to perish.  The king didn’t know she was a jew. Just like Mordecai she refused to just accept injustice.


Gather together

When they were mourning the king’s decision  Jews stood together and they fasted together before Esther went before the king.  Leaders have organized many marches and protest rallies. People all over the world have gathered prayed and protested police brutality especially the killing of mike brown.


Demand Justice

Mordecai demanded that Esther speak to king on behalf. Esther asked the King for justice at  banquet she organized. Later Esther asked the King again until she had justice. Grassroots have continued asked  for justice from local government.


Leaders rise

By the  conclusion of the book of Esther, we have learned that leaders rise. Esther was promoted from harem to queen. Then after becoming queen receiving honor for saving her people. Mordeci went from a jewish elder to the kings’s advisor. Traumatic events cause Esther and Mordeci to step up to leadership. We have seen local leaders in the St. Louis metro area  rise up and organize, pray and keep the peace.